ZEYNEP OKUR GUNER, PhD

The life of an ordinary teen or tween can be surprisingly hectic and stressful. They go to school everyday and are expected to learn a wide range of subjects-some they enjoy, some they don’t. Regardless, they must focus and perform. Psychologist Dr Lisa D’Amour offers a helpful analogy: high school is like an open buffet. In real life, we walk around, choose what we like, and leave what we don’t. In school, however, teens are presented with a buffet of subjects, but they are

In my previous newsletter, I discussed about perfectionism, how it develops and what are the consequences on our children. This week, I want to discuss practical ways we help our kids dealing with perfectionism. Before discussing what helps, it is important to start with what does not help. Any parent who lives with a little perfectionist knows that saying things like ‘Don’t be so hard on yourself!”; “Ease up a little !” does not work. These comments often make them feel mis

“Perfectionism is broadly defined as a combination of excessively high personal standards and overly self critical evaluations” state Curran and Hill (2019). Perfectionism in adolescence has risen dramatically since the 1980’s. A recent UK study suggested that 85.4% of UK teenagers show perfectionist tendencies and 52% of them felt their perfectionist tendencies had a negative impact on their mental health. Perfectionists are different from excellence seekers. The former stri